I can't thank the people who have followed my blog from the get-go for all your words of encouragement and love. Thank you for pushing me to write again. It warms my heart to hear when my readers tell me they enjoyed reading my journey and somehow felt like they were right there with me too. Big love to you all.
Here i am sitting down and staring at the screen. I feel rusty. I haven't done this in a while. My last post was, well ages ago! But - hello! Seeing as i set up this baby blog of mine some 6 years ago, i felt it is only right that i continue writing in it seeing as, as most of you would know by now, i am baking baby number 2 in the oven!
I'm in the last leg of my pregnancy now. I'd call it the 'uncomfortable' stage. Where you feel like a whale, your legs are sore, your body's aching and the baby is kicking like there's no tomorrow. But, kicking is good. Kick away baby, so momma knows you're growing well.
So let's backtrack - how did I find out I was pregnant? Thinking back, it's a rather funny story to me now. I found out I was 3 weeks pregnant back in April. Most people find out a little later. Probably because they wait to miss their monthly periods. I on the other hand, didn't have that issue.
Back then, I was feeling bad cramps in my womb. It came to a point where I'd crouch down in pain and Daniel would go into a panic as he didn't know what was going on with me or why I was feeling so much pain. I decided to pay the woman's clinic that was right across my office a visit. (Which also cost me $300+. Bugger!)
I remember seeing the doctor. Telling him about the cramps in my stomach so he suggested we do an ultrasound. Of course he asked if I was on the pill etc to see if anything had a side effect on me. I told him I was on the pill, I was taking Yaz and have been for the last 5 years. Started on it shortly after having Kiara.
Upon doing an ultrasound, he detected something. He detected a cyst. A cyst that was 2.5cm wide, sitting at the side of my womb. I went into a panic! I've never had a cyst before! What did this mean? Did I have to operate? Was it benign? He told me not to panic. That from his view, it didn't look like it was a problem. That it was just filled with water. That I should wait to get my period and come back after to see if it decreases in size. Based on my pill, i was due to get my period the following week.
Easy for you to say doc - i was losing my shit over the news regardless!
I remember telling Daniel about it. Heck, i even told my boss. They both told me to calm down and just wait and see. So wait, i did.
Fast forward a week later, i was hit with another one of those horrible cramps in my womb. This time round, it came back with a vengeance. I remember trying to shower - i was getting ready for work. The pain was so intense and i remember lying on my bathroom floor and shouting for Daniel. It was so painful i couldn't even stand up. I remember Daniel being in a panicked mode to see me in that kind of pain. He helped me back to the room and i popped 2 painkillers to help with the pain.
I remember texting my boss and telling him i was in too much pain and once i napped off the pain, i was going to go to the hospital. I told Daniel to go to work as well, i could bring myself to the hospital. Besides, there was one literally 5 minutes away from our house.
I woke up a while later to my boss calling my phone. He told me to get ready and that he was driving down to come and get me to bring me to the hospital. (Yep, i have the best boss in the world.)
Fast forward, the A&E said that i had to go and see a gynae instead as it was an issue with my womb and it was best i did an ultrasound. Honestly, when i got to the gynae it never occurred to me that i might be pregnant at all. In fact, the only thing that did pop into my mind was 'did the cyst rupture?'.
"Cheryl, Dr Natalie is ready to see you"
God. I remember feeling so nervous. Don't tell me that there was something wrong with my womb. That was literally the only thing that was going through my mind. I was told to lie on the bed and lift up my top. I remember how cold the gel felt, how the words slowly came to me;
"I can't seem to find the cyst but what i can find is an egg. You're pregnant."
So apparently the fetus, or should i call it the egg sac, was hiding behind the cyst. I found out i was pregnant pretty early. It hadn't even developed a heartbeat as yet. I remember bursting into tears. How could i possibly get pregnant? I didn't get it. I was on the pill. It's not possible! I felt so scared. Like, how was Daniel going to act. Hell, forget him, how was my family going to react?!
I remember crying and walking home. Looking back, i hate that both pregnancies started with me crying. I guess, i was petrified. Petrified of how my family was going to take the news yet again. I worried on how Daniel would take the news.
I remember calling Daniel. Telling him between sobs that i was pregnant. I remember there was just silence on the phone. He didn't speak for a while and next thing he says was - "I'm coming home, i will see you at home."
Long story short, I'm thankful of how supportive Daniel was. I wasn't home yet when he got home. I did a detour and went to have a meal with a close friend, you know who you are, thank you for support - for flying with the wind to come to my aid. I love you.
I remember Daniel was sitting at our usual spot by the windows in the kitchen when i got home. I came to sit down with him and all he said was, "Let me speak first. If you want to abort and concentrate on your career, i understand and i support your decision". While abortion was never on my mind, i appreciated how quick he was to support me regardless of the decision i was going to make. I told him i never did think of an abortion. That the baby is a gift from God and I'd never get rid of it.
Daniel broke down and cried when i told him that. I remember so clearly the emotions that came out from him, the tears that flowed when i said i was keeping the baby and we will figure it out. After all, it's not like we were teenagers and didn't have a stable life. We were/are in our late 20's, we could do this. I asked him why was he crying so hard. Was it relief that i didn't decide on an abortion? While he said that was partially the reason for his breakdown, the main reason was because he felt for years that he couldn't have kids. That it was something he couldn't achieve. The fact that i was pregnant was good news for him.
I smile now thinking of that. Silly man.
We had to go back to see the gynecologist 2 weeks after to let her know of my decision. Also, it was the time a heartbeat would have developed. While i was crying 2 weeks prior upon finding out, this time round, i walked hand in hand with Daniel with anticipation to see if there was a heartbeat. While Dr Natalie was scanning, Daniel was saying out loud, please let there be only 1 heartbeat. (He's an offspring of a twin. So the twin genes is something he has + my mother had twins so felt our chances was higher than the average couple.) But nope, only 1 heartbeat and a strong one at that!
Fast forward to today, I always seem to have a funny way of finding out i am pregnant. And to think I'm due any day now! I'm pooped out from typing. Might be the pregnancy making me sleepy too. Apologies if the story seems jumpy. It's been a long while. But give me some time and i hope to be back at this full force.
Thanks for stopping by and reading. If you're an old reader, hello and welcome back! Till the next post!
I remember texting my boss and telling him i was in too much pain and once i napped off the pain, i was going to go to the hospital. I told Daniel to go to work as well, i could bring myself to the hospital. Besides, there was one literally 5 minutes away from our house.
I woke up a while later to my boss calling my phone. He told me to get ready and that he was driving down to come and get me to bring me to the hospital. (Yep, i have the best boss in the world.)
Fast forward, the A&E said that i had to go and see a gynae instead as it was an issue with my womb and it was best i did an ultrasound. Honestly, when i got to the gynae it never occurred to me that i might be pregnant at all. In fact, the only thing that did pop into my mind was 'did the cyst rupture?'.
"Cheryl, Dr Natalie is ready to see you"
God. I remember feeling so nervous. Don't tell me that there was something wrong with my womb. That was literally the only thing that was going through my mind. I was told to lie on the bed and lift up my top. I remember how cold the gel felt, how the words slowly came to me;
"I can't seem to find the cyst but what i can find is an egg. You're pregnant."
So apparently the fetus, or should i call it the egg sac, was hiding behind the cyst. I found out i was pregnant pretty early. It hadn't even developed a heartbeat as yet. I remember bursting into tears. How could i possibly get pregnant? I didn't get it. I was on the pill. It's not possible! I felt so scared. Like, how was Daniel going to act. Hell, forget him, how was my family going to react?!
Side note: If you've done a course in business law, you would know why some companies market themselves as 99.9% efficient. Like Durex condoms, Dettol etc. Because if for some reason, it doesn't work, you can't sue them in the court of law. Same with contraceptive pills. They are 99.9% effective. I just happen to be that 0.01%.
I remember crying and walking home. Looking back, i hate that both pregnancies started with me crying. I guess, i was petrified. Petrified of how my family was going to take the news yet again. I worried on how Daniel would take the news.
I remember calling Daniel. Telling him between sobs that i was pregnant. I remember there was just silence on the phone. He didn't speak for a while and next thing he says was - "I'm coming home, i will see you at home."
Long story short, I'm thankful of how supportive Daniel was. I wasn't home yet when he got home. I did a detour and went to have a meal with a close friend, you know who you are, thank you for support - for flying with the wind to come to my aid. I love you.
I remember Daniel was sitting at our usual spot by the windows in the kitchen when i got home. I came to sit down with him and all he said was, "Let me speak first. If you want to abort and concentrate on your career, i understand and i support your decision". While abortion was never on my mind, i appreciated how quick he was to support me regardless of the decision i was going to make. I told him i never did think of an abortion. That the baby is a gift from God and I'd never get rid of it.
Daniel broke down and cried when i told him that. I remember so clearly the emotions that came out from him, the tears that flowed when i said i was keeping the baby and we will figure it out. After all, it's not like we were teenagers and didn't have a stable life. We were/are in our late 20's, we could do this. I asked him why was he crying so hard. Was it relief that i didn't decide on an abortion? While he said that was partially the reason for his breakdown, the main reason was because he felt for years that he couldn't have kids. That it was something he couldn't achieve. The fact that i was pregnant was good news for him.
I smile now thinking of that. Silly man.
We had to go back to see the gynecologist 2 weeks after to let her know of my decision. Also, it was the time a heartbeat would have developed. While i was crying 2 weeks prior upon finding out, this time round, i walked hand in hand with Daniel with anticipation to see if there was a heartbeat. While Dr Natalie was scanning, Daniel was saying out loud, please let there be only 1 heartbeat. (He's an offspring of a twin. So the twin genes is something he has + my mother had twins so felt our chances was higher than the average couple.) But nope, only 1 heartbeat and a strong one at that!
Fast forward to today, I always seem to have a funny way of finding out i am pregnant. And to think I'm due any day now! I'm pooped out from typing. Might be the pregnancy making me sleepy too. Apologies if the story seems jumpy. It's been a long while. But give me some time and i hope to be back at this full force.
Thanks for stopping by and reading. If you're an old reader, hello and welcome back! Till the next post!
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